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Shake Weight Spoof – Rod Quake 3000

The Shake Weight is a real product sold as a workout product for women.  If you would like to know more about the real product you can find reviews here:

http://ezinearticles.com/?Shake-Weight-Reviews-Pros-and-Cons-of-Shake-Weight&id=3441333

"Ladies! Are you tired of reading crappy sex tips in magazines that just don't work? Introducing the Rodquake 3000 – the key to handjob mastery. "

You can purchase the actual Shake Weight on Amazon by clicking the link below:

http://www.amazon.com/Shake-Weight-Exercise-As-Seen/dp/B002V3E2TE

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Bill O’Reilly vs his Producer – Freak out

Bill O’Reilly spliced in spoof producer while he freaks out. 

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Allison – Intervention – It’s like I’m Walking on sunshine

In September 2009, Intervention did a followup check-in with Allison and she is supposedly now clean helping others but in our hearts she will always be the girl that is walking on sunshine.

Quotes:  “We are going on a drug run … hooray!”, “It’s like I’m walking on sunshine!”

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Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny

The Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny

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External Harddrives – Common questions and pricing review

I like external harddrives.  There are a few f.a.qs I wanted to quickly explain and cover that could be of use to users of external harddrives.

Some basics:  I have 3 Western Digital external harddrives varying in sizes from 500GB to 1.5TB.  I have a few external drives that I built by sticking IDE or SATA drives in enclosures.  Finally I have a few Seagate External harddrives varying in capacity from 700GB to 1.5TB.

I prefer using Western Digital external harddrives.  I have had good luck with speed, reliability, nice casing, and good price.

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RPX Login Plugin for Facebook

So I'm currently testing out this login plugin for WordPress called RPX.  It allows people to login to our system using Facebook, Google or WordPress.  At first I was a little unsure, thinking that someone could login and mess up everything we've written so far/out settings, etc.  But looking through the available options to someone (and writing this post as a 'guest' writer using my facebook account) everything looks good.  So while we finishing tweaking the site design/plugins and other stuff, you guys can now login using your facebook or google accounts and write guest columns.

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The Flitcraft Parable: Excerpt from The Maltese Falcon

This is The Flitcraft Parable that was left out of the movie The Maltese Falcon.  The Maltese Falcon was the first story to introduce the hardboiled cop.

"        Spade sat down in the armchair beside the table and without any preliminary, without an introductory remark of any sort, began to tell the girl about a thing that had happened some years before in the Northwest. He talked in a steady matter-of-fact voice that was devoid of emphasis or pauses, though now and then he repeated a sentence slightly rearranged, as if it were important that each detail be related exactly as it had happened.

       At the beginning Brigid O'Shaughnessy listened with only partial attentiveness, obviously more surprised by his telling the story than interested in it, her curiousity more engaged with his purpose in telling the story than with the story he told; but presently, as the story went on, it caught her more and more fully and she became still and receptive.

       A man named Flitcraft had left his real-estate-office, in Tacoma, to go to luncheon one day and had never returned. He did not keep and engagement to play golfafter four that afternoon, though he had taken the initiative in making the engagement less than half and hour before he went out to luncheon. His wife and children never saw him again. His wife and he were supposed to be on the best of terms. He had two children, boys, one five an dthe other three. He owned his house in a Tacoma suburb, a new Packard, and the rest of the appurtenances of successful American living.

      Flitcraft had inherited seventy thousand dollars from his father, and, with his sucess in real estate, was worth something in the neighbourhood of two hundred thousand dollars at the time he vanished. His affars were in order, though there were enough loose ends to indicate that he had not been setting them in order preparatory to vanishing. Adeal tha would have brought him an attractive profit, for instance, was to have been concluded the day after the one on which he diappeared. There was nothing to suggest that he had more than fifty or sixty dollars in his immediate posession at the time of his going. His habits for months past could be accounted for too thoughly to justify any suspicion of secret vices, or even of another woman in his life, though either was barely possible.

       "He went like that," Spade said, "like a fist when you open your hand,"

       …

       "… Well, that was in 1922. In 1927 I was with one of the big detective agencies in Seattle. Mrs. Flitcraft came in and told us somebody had seen a man in Spokane who looked a lot like her husband. I went over there. It was Flitcraft, all right. He had been living in Spokane for a couple of years as Charles – that was his first name – Pierce. He had a automobile-business that was netting him twenty or twenty-five thousand a year, a wife, a baby son, owned his home in a Spokane suburb, and usually got away to play glof after four in the afternoon during the season."

       Spade had not been told very definitely what to do when he found Flitcraft. They talked in Spade's room at the Davenport. Flitcraft had no feeling of guilt. He had left his first family well provided for, and what he had done seemed to him perfectly reasonable. The only thing that bothered him was a doubt that he could make that reasonableness clear to Spade. He had never told anybody his story before, and thus had not had to attempt to make its reasonableness explicit. He tried now.

       "I got it all right," Spade told Brigid O'Shaughnessy, "but Mrs. Flitcraft never did. She thought it was silly. Maybe it was. Anyway it came out all right. She didn't want any scandal, and, after the trick he had played on her – the way she looked at it – she didn't want him. So they were divorced on the quiet and everything was swell all around.

       "Here's what happened to him. Going to luch he passed an office-building that was being put up – just the skeleton. A beam or something fell eight or ten stories down and smacked the sidewalk alongside him. It brushed pretty close to him, but didn't touch him, though a piece of the sidewalk was chipped off and flew up and hit his cheek. It only took a piece of skin off, but he still had the scar when I saw him. He rubbed it with his finger – well, affectionately – when he told me about it. He was scared stiff of course, he said, but he was more shocked than really frightened. He felt like somebody had taken the lid off life and let him look at the works."

       Flitcraft had been a good citizen and a good husband and father, not by any outer compulsion, but simply because he was a man most comfortable in step with his surroundings. He had been raised that way. The people he knew were like that. The life he knew was a clean orderly sane responsible affair. Now a falling beam had shown him that life was fundamentally none of these things. He, the good citizen-husband-father, could be wiped out between office and restaurant by the accident of a falling beam. He knew then that men died at haphazard like that, and lived only while blind chance spared them.

       It was not, primarily, the injustice of it that disturbed him: he accepted that after the first shock. What disturbed him was the discovery that in sensibly ordering his affairs he had got out of step, and not in step, with life. He said he knew before he had gone twenty feet from the fallen beam that he would never know peace until he had adjusted himself to this new glimpse of life. By tht time he had eaten his luncheon he had found his means of adjustment. Life could be ended for him at random by a falling beam: he would change his life at random by simply going away. He loved his family, he said, as much as he supposed was usual, but he knew he was leaving them adequately provided for, and his love for them was not of the sort that would make absence painful.

       He went to Seattle that afternoon," Spade said, "and from there by boat to San Francisco. For a couple of years he wandered around and then drifted back to the Northwest, and settled in Spokane and got married. His second wife didn't look like the first, but they were more alike than they were different. You know, the kind of women that play fair games of golf and bridge and like new salad-recipes. He wasn't sorry for what he had done. It seemed reasonable enough to him. Idon't think he even knew he had settled back naturally in the same groove he had jumped out of in Tacoma. But that the part of it I always liked. He adjusted himself to beams falling, and then no more of them fell, and he adjusted himself to them not falling."

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Flip Video UltraHD Camcorder – MiniCam review

I’ve been looking around for a minicam for taking out to bars and quickly catching those embarassing moments that should be posted on YouTube.com.  My searching brought me to the Flip Video cams by Pure Digital, a Cisco company.

The purpose here is to post a quick overview of the Flip Video UltraHD camcorder.

Overall Pros:

• Compact size
• Good quality video
• Records both video and audio
• Has a rechargable battery that can be replaced with 2 AA batteries in a pinch
• Recharges via USB
• Very easy controls
• Powers up/ready to go in 3 seconds
• Good quality vs price
• Easy controls
• H.264 video compression (saves as MP4 file)
• HD 1280 x 720 @ 30 fps

Overall Cons

• Software for editing packaged is too simple
• Battery recharge is not fast
• Panning with video cam causes stuttering
• No expandable memory via SD
• Poor 2x zoom
• A USB cable would have been better than the switch USB design

Currently (December 2009, January 2010) – Flip Video UltraHD Camcorders can be found for about $150. Buy it here

Result:  Good price for features but if you are looking for a solution of portability and full featured camcorder control.  This isn’t it.  But what do you expect for $150.00

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John Keats – Love letter on March 1820

This is a love letter written by John Keats to his beloved Fanny in March 1820.   Sweetest Fanny,

     You fear, sometimes, I do not love you so much as you wish?
     My dear Girl I love you ever and ever and without reserve.
     The more I have known you the more have I lov’d. In every way – even my jealousies have been agonies of Love, in the hottest fit I ever had I would have died for you.
     I have vex’d you too much. But for Love! Can I help it?
     You are always new. The last of your kisses was ever the sweetest; the last smile the brightest; the last movement the gracefullest.
     When you pass’d my window home yesterday, I was fill’d with as much admiration as if I had then seen you for the first time.
     You uttered a half complaint once that I only lov’d your Beauty.
     Have I nothing else then to love in you but that?
     Do not I see a heart naturally furnish’d with wings imprison itself with me?
     No ill prospect has been able to turn your thoughts a moment from me.
     This perhaps should be as much a subject of sorrow as joy – but I will not talk of that.
     Even if you did not love me I could not help an entire devotion to you: how much more deeply then must I feel for you knowing you love me.
     My Mind has been the most discontented and restless one that ever was put into a body too small for it.
     I never felt my Mind repose upon anything with complete and undistracted enjoyment – upon no person but you.
     When you are in the room my thoughts never fly out of window: you always concentrate my whole senses.
     The anxiety shown about our Love in your last note is an immense pleasure to me; however you must not suffer such speculations to molest you any more: not will I any more believe you can have the least pique against me.
     Brown is gone out — but here is Mrs Wylie — when she is gone I shall be awake for you.
     – Remembrances to your Mother.

Your affectionate, J. Keats

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Guinness Goodness

Guinness is some fine tasting beer.  Excellent on a cold snowy day.  Especially good for a night out.  Why … well funny enough Guinness is super low in alcohol content.  Have you ever had a Coors in your hand and had someone make a remark about your manhood?  Well Coors is actually higher in alcohol content than Guinness.  Guinness comes in at about 4.0% by volume and Coors Light comes in at about 4.2%.  This means if my math is correct … you can have 1 extra Guinness for every 20 Coors Lights you could drink …

Now for some bad news.  Guinness website needs to be less pretty and more for the everyday user.  I couldn't find information on my favorite beer without hitting the sitemap link at the bottom.  Bad bad bad.