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May 29, 2014

Posted by in Featured, Gossip, Movies | 0 Comments

Jupiter’s not the only thing ascending: I’ve got a rocket in my pocket for Mila Kunis

So hot ... the idea that a woman in the world may be washing clothes

So hot … the idea that a woman in the world may be washing clothes

Jupiter Ascending is one of the most anticipated movies of 2014.  Sadly, this explains the drought we are in for movies.  Jupiter Ascending is from the brothers who brought you Matrix and the follow up, limp sequels.  I wanted to swallow my tongue watching the trailer as I tried to figure out what the f$ck this movie was about.  Set in modern day … but wait … there is a space ship … and then we are in space with some epic looking aliens …. but then there is a dragon …. and this regular cleaning girl played by Mila Kunis??? is a princess or queen …

IMDB’s take “In the future, a young destitute human woman, played by Mila Kunis, gets targeted for assassination by the Queen of the Universe, and begins her destiny to finish the Queen’s reign.  That’s the plot?  Ok so for anyone who has a cleaning lady that looks like Mila Kunis, how does the movie not show the dude that hired her touching himself while she is bent cleaning the floors? This is Mila Kunis for God sake … let’s review for a moment:

No sadly, Mila Kunis is pregnant and the guy that ruined her appears to be Ashton Kutcher, the guy giving all mediocre looking guys hope.

To all the guys that wish they could have Mila Kunis … there still maybe loose chance.

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